STAGES OF MARRIAGE

In general people “fall in love” and get married expecting that everything will fall into place and great happiness will ensue. What actually occurs is that two different people, each with his/her own life experiences, values and ideas of what the marriage should be like, come together to start a new family that will have its own style and expectations. This is not easy or automatic.

When a child joins the family everything changes again. The child is the center of attention generally, especially for the mother who may also experience intense hormonal changes. Fathers frequently become more concerned about their adequacy as providers and must deal with the changes in their partner. Differences in parenting style and expectations also surface. Much of what was done as a couple is no longer applicable. A new life style must be developed. As time goes on this adaptation becomes more settled and familiar but when a second or third child arrives the old patterns are once again disrupted and changes must occur. – continue